Finish lines are starting lines in disguise

I started this blog, this little writing experiment, twenty-eight days ago in order to test myself. I wanted to see what would happen if I wrote every day and held myself accountable for that writing by publishing every day. 

Here’s what I learned. 

I do a better job when I write first thing in the morning. I get sloppier as the day goes on. I let clichés slide in. I don’t edit myself as well. My words just don’t come as easily.  I goof up. I get awkward. 

The writing took up a lot of time. I figured I’d need maybe an hour, ninety minutes tops, for each blog post.  I think ninety minutes was the least amount of time I spent. Most posts took about three hours, though a few took longer.

The thinking took up a lot of time. Sometimes, I sat down with just a fuzzy idea of what I would write. I’d start typing up the first thoughts that would come. I’d use the act of writing to work out what I wanted to write about.  By the time I got to the third, sixth or eighth paragraph, I’d see a common theme emerge, then I’d delete everything and start over. A few times, I wrote up entire pieces, then deleted them.

The thinking was constant. “What will I write about next?” popped into my head as often as “what should I have for lunch, dinner, dessert?” Often, one blog idea would lead to another. Sometimes, comments from some of you prompted certain blogs. 

I loved doing it. How do I know? Eating is my favorite thing in the world next to reading, running, Springsteen and Showtime. When I was writing, I forgot to eat.  For example, when I wrote in the morning, this is roughly what my routine would be like. I’d wake up around eight. Have some coffee, surf the net, skulk around on facebook, surf the net, have more coffee, and then I’d start to type around nine. I’d write, rewrite, add, delete, review.

Finally I’d notice my bottom was aching. Or maybe my knees would start cramping up. Or my throat was dry. I’d get up to stretch or get a glass  of water, and discover that it was after twelve, and I was still in my pajamas and I hadn’t eaten in a half a day and none of it bothered me.  

I’m not thrilled with everything I wrote, and sometimes I knew that I wasn’t even as I hit the publish button. Sometimes this was because of topic, but usually it was because of a clunkiness in the writing that I didn’t take the time to work out. There’s more. I could go on and on about redundancies, grammar errors, repetition.  But the thing is, I had fun and I learned a lot and I’m so glad I did this.    

So what I need to consider next is how to proceed. The next week is busy. Work starts up again and that will draw off all my time and energy for a little while until I adapt to my new schedule.  How do I keep the writing momentum going? Do I cut back to blogging once a week? Twice a week? I haven’t figured that out yet.

And then there’s the issue of the effect my real-world work has on me. As I’ve gotten closer and closer to the start of the school year, I find it harder to quiet my head and focus. I’m feeling off center and out of balance. I’ve misplaced my thoughtful center. I need to figure out how to find it when it goes missing.

Thanks for all your kind comments. Thanks for reading my writing.  I hope to be back soon. I need to be back soon.