I had run out of Body Glide, which is to long distance runners what water is NOT to a drowning woman -- an absolute necessity, unless you enjoy chafing. So naturally, I went from my bedroom to my running warehouse -- my car of course -- to get a new supply.
Here's what else I found.
1. Two heat blankets from races last fall.
2. An extra pair of running shoes.
3. Seven hats with visors, just in case I need extra sun/wind/rain/snow protection.
4. Sunscreen bottle, empty.
5. A hefty pile of change and two one dollar bills.
6. An embarrassing amount of empty water bottles.
7. One race medal because you can't expect me to drag my lazy ass self AND all the race stuff out of the car after that hellish half marathon and that two hour drive home.
8. A crushed race bib with four safety pins still attached.
9. More than enough safety pins for the next 300 races. Still, I better leave that bib with extra pins in the car, just to be on the safe side.
10. A half empty jar of vaseline in case I run out Body Glide which will happen when hell freezes over because chafing sucks.
11. Another Body Glide, full.
12. Three windbreakers which I plan on bringing in the house sometime soon but not today because I only ran out to the car to retrieve the Body Glide and don't want to waste time putting things in closets and drawers because I don't want anything to distract me from getting started on this long run.
13. Four gloves, none of them matching.
14. One Power Bar, unopened and expired.
15. Two ice scrapers because it's May in New England and you never know.
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| This is what shame looks like. |
